Saturday, May 9, 2009

I ain't nev'r scared...

Been a long time...sorry for the high-ate-us but ive been busy scraping the bottom without much to share besides pity party pussy-achin'...and nobody wants to read about that whiney shit. and if they do, they can go read *Mosca's blog.

*sorry kevin, but that shit sucks.

BUT...the last two or three weeks have really turned my frowny upside downy...first off, i got a new job. It's located directly accross from my last job that i got fired from for keeping it TOO REAL. like, literally in the same building. pretty awesome walkin in there and watching the dick'mouths shiver as they make my up-side-down caramel machiatto that they KNOW i aint payin for...thats right bitch, EASY ON THE CARAMEL DRIZZLE! so thats fun. I'm now slingin' sammiches for a local eatery called "Toaster Oven" and boyyy is it easy...in comparison to Starfuck's rigid policies about tattoo's and the clueless sheeple who work there, this place is fucking awesome. Color me stoked.

On top of that, my visit to the clinic two weeks ago turned out to be the smartest thing ive done since that time i invented sliced bread. DISCLAIMER: What your about to read is really really gross. im not proud of it, but shit happens NAH'MEAN?! and NO, it has nothing to do with any diseases transmitted sexually. my reproductive organs are in tip top shape, i mean seriously...you should see it. anyhow, about a month and a half ago, i got this weird bump on my ass that was all sorts of itchy, i thought maybe i got bit by a spider in my sleep or some shit. so i itched and itched. then it started migrating (from scratching because im a dummy) and soon spread to damn near all over my body from the neck down. i would wake up at 4am scratchng myself raw in my sleep. still, i just consulted walgreens and went through a few tubes of Cortizone10 to chillax the itchy devils that now resided in my bloodstream. by now its been over 3 weeks of this. im not buggin too bad because well, it didnt spread to my face or my dick...that is untill i was taking a piss, looked down and realized HOLY SHIT IT SPREAD TO MY DICK!!!! AHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOO!!!! that was the end of me not giving a fuck about a silly rash. i IMMEDIATLY got myself to the free clinic to get'r looked at...turns out i somehow contracted muh'fuckin SCABIES. holy shit. how fucking gross am i? i have NO IDEA how i got'em but sure as shit they were now runnin rampant all over my body. the doctor hooked me up with this one-time application cream shit that kills the microscopic parasites that had infested my body. i had to wash all the clothes ive worn since i started itchin, as well as my sheets/blankets etc. pain in the ass? YES. worth it? ABSOFUCKINGLUTLEY. the itching didnt stop for a few more weeks but i was no longer contagious and the itching was no where near as bad as it was. im almost completely healed now except for some blemishes here and there that iitch a little from time to time...again, color me stoked. theres a lesson to be learned from my public display of how fucking grimey i am, it's that if you ever have a rash of ANY KIND that starts spreading, get that shit checked out ASAP. free clinics work great but if your one of them fancy pants'ers than consult your personal physician. Scabies are fucking gross and will turn your normally shitty disposition into a full on fuck-my-life attitude. Consider yourself warned.

So that was literally the bottom of the barrel for me. But once i got off my ass, all of a sudden things started finally going my way. It wasnt so much that life was shitting on ME, it was that i was shitting on my life.

In other news, my roomate Ethan moved out (on good terms) along with Jess so we had two open rooms for rent begining in May. We were a little stressed because it meant a change in the dynamic of the house, and who knows what kind of deril's would move in...but in no time flat, we found two homies who just so happened to need a spot and boom-bang-pow that shits taken care of. Both are homies from way back and theyre working out just fine, plus i moved into ethans room when he moved out which saves me $80 in rent somehow, even though its a bigger room than my last one AND ive got my own door to our sick little backyard. again, color me ______.

On top of all this, Potrero Del Sol is still only 6 blocks from me. i can skate the best skatepark in california all day everyday. never-mind the impromptu demo's that go on every night by accident because this city is chock full of pro's and bro's, but after 3 years of research, ive concluded that i was meant to skate concrete. i maintain a healthy diet of street schralp of course, but theres just nothing like going mach 9 trying to figure out the lines that Dennis just blazed, or going mach 9 and scraping a 5-0 in the deep end of the most perfect bowl ive ever skated. if you cant tell by now, i have a boner for Potrero. ive had to tape it down while i skate or BA might notice and think he might have a shot at such a ruggedly handsome man as myself. I'm such a tease, i know.

I gotta wrap'r up here because as we speak, the dudes are firing up the grill at the park and well...thats wayyyyy cooler than sitting in my room on a perfect saturday afternoon typing about how interesting i am. so go fuck yourself. get outside. skate'm if ya got'm. and NANU-NANU and all that good shit. to the 4 people that will read this, i loves ya, nev'r fer'git.

TwoTimes